A Dusk's Delusion
by FanFicAddict02
Summary: Everyone must face Love at some point, in all its forms with all its consequences, but the Quality can be diminished in so many more ways than that. When one finds out how, how do they ever learn from it?


**_A Dusk's Delusion  
_**

**Chapter One****  
**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Toy Story or any of its characters.  
**

**Summary: Everyone must face Love at some point, in all its forms with all its consequences, but the Quality can be diminished in so many more ways than that. When one finds out how, how do they ever learn from it?**

* * *

**_"In friendship, as in love, we are often more happy from the things we are ignorant of than from those we are acquainted with." - François de La Rochefoucauld._**

* * *

Love was a treasure many didn't understand. A fine divine to the heart and mind linking to the centre of the core's essence to blossom into eternal serenity and peace of Thought. A saviour; a convict just as likely; but more often just a cloaked stranger with a bundle over a poignant shoulder. Neither Death at the Wake of Dusk nor Hope at the Fall of Dawn. Instead, a blind elder sheathed in melancholy at the midst of midday with its arrow aimed impetuously at the rest of the world, ready to fire... The reality, was this and, in the end depending upon the arrow how the lathering concoction of sentiments proceed, a target will be chosen.

Any arrow could instigate any emotion; a lottery not quite fathomed by the rest of the world. Hatred for feeling, Passion for recognition, and the Ignorance to affection could all be a apart of the mix. A lost dream, a distanced love, and one which hasn't been spoken, nor recognized, were only few results from what could be chosen. Though, yet, they were the most painful of all...

~X~X~X~

_"He's getting away, Sheriff!" The usual, but different. "We need to stop him!"_

_Silence on his part, in his confusion. "Something happened to Buzz!"  
_

_"And you have to save him! Sheriff, the town is depending on you." Resignedly, said the sidekick.  
_

_There was no point.  
_

_"Woody!"  
_

_There was no aim.  
_

_"He's counting on you!"  
_

_There was no-one to count on.  
_

_"No, he isn't."  
_

_"Yes he is!"  
_

_More silence meandered, but it wasn't heard.  
_

_"He's gone."  
_

_She shook her head, incredulous. "No-"  
_

_"He's one of _them_!"  
_

_...  
_

"Andy, dear." There was a voice. One so tender and mild he barely heard it, at first. "Andy?"

He stopped where he was, his toys in his tiny hands and scattered all about. "Yeah?"

"We're going over to your grand-mother's for lunch, remember?" He did, just about. "So pick up your stuff, sweetheart, and we'll get going."

"But I was in the middle of a game," was his only response.

"Well you can finish it when we get home. Okay?" Andy's eyes drooped to a glower, but stopped himself for fear of the worst. "C'mon." The enthusiasm was idle. "We're already late."

The young boy sighed, making to his feet and collecting his items. With one last look of his toys as he headed to the hallway, he frowned.

He closed the door shut behind him.

~X~X~X~

It has been said that loving and losing is one of the worst pains of them all. One that devours its prey from inside, a plague to the thoughts. Bittersweet, almost, though the mordancy is the only taste to last. Losing though is not as much fear as it is wretched reality. To lose you would have to love, and affection never comes on a whim; but even after the search Love feels eternal inside. So the notion of Loss always is to be disregarded, until lived. Then, there is only the truth they've overlooked.

**_Why does it hurt so much?_**

~X~X~X~_  
_

"Jessie?" She didn't like the sound of that voice in her thought, so cocked her head. "Are you okay?" It was strange. The water not quite seeping through the cotton, perchance? No - that could never be it for her sulking self.

The words were sinking in.

Her verdant green eyes opened, slight confusion bubbling inside the emerald spheres. "Jess?" She felt the hands at her shoulder. Just so lightly, like the tender pecking of a curious robin.

Again, there was silence on her part. Lodged in thought, trailing off to a land so distant... It was her worst place. Yet...she couldn't escape.

"You look upset." Did she? That was strange; Jessie didn't even remember ever responding to her. Yet she was not oblivious to the constant wrench of her mouth, retorting the constant chorus of, _"I'm _fine_."_

The shepherdess tilted her head to the side, her brow puckering. Jessie had not moved since Andy's departure perhaps five minutes before, instead sitting on the floor holding her legs close to her chest. Bo had only known her for a day, but already she had taken a liking to Jessie's delectable upbeat character. The cowgirl was obviously upset, and Bo knew better than to question twice in her mind if she was. There was just no way to mask sentiment like this.

"It looks like there's something bothering-"

"There isn't." Jessie interrupted, biting her lips. "I'm just thinking."

So she was - it was not a lie. Of what that playtime had to offer, and of how she'd been oblivious for the last few days as to how long it'd been since she'd last been played with. She hasn't felt joy like that for a _very _long time. It was almost like the playtimes with Emily...

"Well, if you're sure about that, then I'll leave you to your peace." Bo began, fondly. "But if you need anything, just come to me."

"I will."

Bo smiled once more, uneasily departing as Jessie remained where she was. With a sigh feeling pessimism inside her for the way she'd put Bo's concerns at disregard she lifted to her feet, grousing as she left her current space for anywhere else in the room.

~X~X~X~

Some could argue that having loved and lost was the better alternative to being the outcast in knowledge of what it was like, just as living and succumbing to Death was better than not having lived at all. But the discrepancy was only vague, if even there. To love, you would gain, but to lose you would snivel. Loss always has been the heavier burden, and can feast until surfeit. If one cannot feel love, one cannot feel the pain.

~X~X~X~

"Okay - just ease 'im out _slowly_."

Buzz walked up from behind them, his browline officially becoming one with his headgear. "Slinky?" he echoed, incredulous at what he saw. He stepped from behind him and addressed the others, almost curtly. "May I ask, why is Rex trapped under the head-desk?"

"Oh, Buzz! Thank God you're here!" came the hysterical cry of the World's Worst Scarer. Buzz frowned, crossing his arms. He wasn't sure _what _was going on here. But, considering not Rex's inane record of heedless gaucheness, it was most preferably something he could do _without. _

Sighing, he asked, "What happened?"

"I'm stuck!" _Thanks for the obvious. _Still, Buzz stepped closer. He watched Rex as he wriggled himself about, trying to loosen himself where his head'd wedged between the wood and floor.

"I meant _how _did this happen?" The Space Ranger in turn asked. The corners of his lips cocking down into a small glower, he tilted his head. "Andy only left five minutes ago."

He didn't even have to wait for the words to pass his lips before the rest of them slowly stepped backwards, all with nervous smiles looking down at their feet. Buzz took his time examining them all: Slinky, Mr. Potato-Head, standing with a bald spot holding his hat in his hands, Hamm and, of course, the squeamish Great-Beast. A sigh.

The spud drove his elbow into Hamm's sides, hissing.

Hamm almost jumpled. "Well - you see, there was a minor difficulty in one of our scheduled pass-times-"

"I tried to stop them, Buzz!" Slinky padded forward just slightly, his coils springing this-way-and-that. "I promise! But they didn't-"

"You didn't stop_ him_ from using my hat as a frisbee!" countered Potato-Head, snobbishly slapping his hat back down on his head.

"_You _wouldn't listen!" Buzz mentally felt like a tennis racket as he turned his head in each direction to heed their curt inputs, listening to contradicting voices.

"Why, I oughtta-" began the spud, shaking his fist in the air.

Buzz groaned. "This is no time to start fighting!" he said, determinedly. Anticipation for what he would do rose within him when he felt their inquiring gazes settle upon him, asking what dared not to be asked. _How? _Arguments were natural, especially to such a chaotic grouping. "We need to coordinate together to get Rex out of there with as little harm as possible. One bad pull, and you can rip the head straight off of him."

"What?" bellowed Rex's muffled voice in shock. Buzz explained practically with as little information as possible what he aimed to do, how they were going to pull him out languidly and deliberately in the hopes of inflicting the least damage on the floor, and set to work.

"Okay, guys," said Buzz, readying himself. "When I count to three, we pull backwards." The few toys all made a contribution by grabbing a hold of either Rex's leg, or someone already holding on. Buzz was at the front, his fingers drumming. "One, two, _three. _Now!"

"But I don't want to lose my head!" Yelled Rex, as they pulled and they pulled. There was some minor improvement, but the results couldn't carry forth due to Rex's inability to touch the ground with his arms. One whimper later, Buzz stepped back to check his progress.

_Barely anything._

"Are you sure this is going to work?"

"Of course it is!"

"But, how can you be sure?" Retorted the spud once more. Buzz slapped the palm of his hand up against his forehead. He did not answer; he was sure they'd know it by now already.

"Oh, just leave him to his deluded self." Narcissism of the vainest sort flooded this new voice. The Space Ranger turned, slightly, to face the piggy-bank with lowered eyes. "He obviously knows what he's doing. After all, he was trained by _Star Command_."

For a moment there was a recognition of shock on his face as the words drove in. There was one of incredulous poignancy, so fresh it made him flinch. Then, just a moment later, he swallowed the lump in his throat and went back to work.

~X~X~X~

For others, however, being parted from the one of whom you cherish is the worst burden of them all. So close to them but always so far away to be able to reach out, and claim the love eternal. Able to smell the brewing concoction but unable to see for themselves if the standards were met. It is the saddest of them all. If one cannot cherish the love, how can they know if it is real?

~X~X~X~

_"And Sheriff Woody saves the day again!"_

Woody stirred in his thought. He obviously had a very good sixth sense, as his painted sienna eyes moved to her before she was even close to speaking.

"Hi, Bo." he greeted, regrettably it seemed. Below him, Bo could see, hunkered a small notepad bombarded by his unkempt notes. _That's odd... _She tilted her head slightly to the left, her porcelain smile drooping. "Are you all right?"

She shook her head, the words cutting into her pondering thought. "Oh, yes, Woody dear," answered Bo with an upturned beat. He returned the smile, turning back to his work for a moment to finish crafting the rest of his sentence onto the smudging canvas of white and black. Bo watched, smiling still as she fidgeted with the crook in her hands. For the sake of the future conversation, she asked plainly, "What are you doing, dear?"

Woody tensed slightly, as if his personal space had been invaded. He nudged his head, blankly. "I'm just writing down some notes..."

"For what?"

He blinked. "For the staff meeting."

Her upper lip twitched. "Already?" Deliberated Bo, wringing her hands around her crook some more. "I thought we had one only a few days ago?"

"Jessie and Bullseye haven't had an official welcome into our family yet," Woody elucidated, as though the answer was obvious. "I want to make sure they feel sure about some things over here. I wouldn't want them to feel left out."

"That's very kind of you."

He chortled, kindly in forced gratitude. "I just want us all to feel comfortable while we're still Andy's."

"You were never this courteous to Buzz when he first arrived." Bo said, laughing lightly in response. "Why the sudden change in heart, mister?"

"Yeah - I wasn't as nice as I could've been to Buzz, and look how that turned out." Woody was more sombre that he'd realized, but strung his lips in abnegation. "Besides, Bullseye and Jessie have been through hard times. The least they deserve is to be acknowledged."

"I guess you're right..."

He lifted a brow. "Are you okay?" _No answer. _She was lost in thought, elsewhere by the looks of it. Unsure of what to do, he instigated, "Bo?"

Bo just batted her eyelids. "Yes?"

"Are you all right?" Concerned, he made to his feet. "You look upset... Is there something bothering you?"

"No-" She stopped when she felt his incredulous eyes pierce through her frontage. "It's nothing, Woody, honestly. You'll think it's silly."

A chuckle of compassion. "Try me."

"Well, it's just..." She wasn't sure quite how to word what was on her mind. If she let her words fall into disarray, her attempt would be ludicrous. "Andy hasn't involved me in any of his games since you came back."

Woody had to think twice, to make sure he was hearing this right. "Well, we've only been back a couple of days, Bo..." He smacked his lips together. "I'm sure he's just getting used to his extended collection.

She sighed, disheartened with herself. "I know... " she dismissed her pondering with a shake of her head. "I'm sorry, Woody. This is completely stupid."

"No, it's not."

"You think so?"

"Of course I do." He replied, earnestly having tasted the fruit of Doubt before. "No problem is stupid." _But Bo... _He almost couldn't believe Bo would be upset by something like this. Of all the toys in their group, she was the most humble, able to look inside and outside of the box for the well-being of others when she pleased. The fact that she was feeling concern for something as small as being left out of a few playtimes was beyond Woody.

Nevertheless, he couldn't blame her when he truly thought about it. Having thought so, Bo had been left out of a few playtimes; the Damsel in Distress concept either being abandoned or occupied by Jessie. For once, Bo wasn't the Damsel needing to be saved. In his deep thought, it was just like how it used to be with him when Buzz started being granted the saviour of the day...

"I guess you're right," she muttered under her breath, her sky-blue sapphire eyes looking down. "After all, Andy's just excited." _Unconvinced. _A feathery chortle. "I'm just getting ahead of myself."

He was still watching her questionably as she thanked him, oblivious as she uttered a small farewell and was then rendered lost in his recollection as she walked away.

It's happened before, now happening at this very moment to someone whom he dearly loves. _It could happen again, at any time,_ was his uncertain thought as he returned to his notes. Love doesn't last forever. Woody had been Andy's father's favourite toy, with very little discrepancy in the ranking. He was the only one left.

_Doubt plays a horrible game._

_...  
_

A/N All right, I know this is something I've hardly (probably never) touched upon before, therefore quite unlike anything else I've tried out before, but this is a concept I've wanted to try my hand at for _weeks_.

When watching the movies a while back, I pondered briefly over how Pixar presents their characters in this particular media franchise and the_ somewhat-symbollic_ hidden complications these characters have within them. In a select majority, I noticed some of the worries of them affected their adherences to their owners (or central focus of devotion) someway or another [for example, Rex fears his inability to scare the others to be his own personal burden when it comes to the hierarchy of whom Andy cherishes the most].

Shortly afterwards, an idea started to form in my head, and has been a nuisance ever since. So I decided to focus on the central characters to explore the flaws in which affect their bond to their owners, though it could be just utter nonsense. :-)

~x~FanFicAddict02


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